Happy white day!! To begin with, white day is a day where a girl response towards a guy that charm her during Valentine’s Day. Wonderful isn’t it? I remember the day or the only day that I celebrated white day. Peculiar, that’s how I felt now, regretting and painfully crying deep inside but there’s nothing I could do. Really nothing.

Should I talk to her? I left her offline messages that has no replies. I’m just wondering if she does takes me as a friend or rather a special friend. Ah, I miss her so so much. I hope to see her face to face but I’m afraid it’ll be too awkward for her or maybe also for me. These things ruminates in my head over and over again and I just can’t seem to stop mulling over it. I wish to know many things, many many things but definitely who am I to even ask her from now on.

I feel like a goon thinking things that leads to dead ends but somehow I couldn’t stop. Sometimes, I hate it for being where I am right now. If only I were there for her, things could have change, many confusions in security could even not happen.

I read a blog from a friend of mine they are far apart but in the same country. Still, their relationship is so strong. That friend even surprises his bf with a trip to another country when her bf is overseas. I mean that’s crazily amazing. I wish to do so. I so want to but I can’t. Life is no better than dead is what I felt sometimes but I had learn too, being dead isn’t so bad after all. Heaven, a place where there’s no weeping, no sorrow. Do Christians still look to that? I love looking towards that so badly even right now. People tend to get to comfy with life on earth that even some prefer holding on and going heaven later.

The thing is its great she’s enjoying herself there. What I can hope now is that she treats me as a brother that shares things with me, ups and downs but it just seems to hard. Her new life is a beautiful start from what she has back home. A new clear dream is open and how lovely a dream guy came along. Sigh, I wish there are things I could pour out my feelings or people whom I can do so.

No matter what, life goes on, right? =) Time shall pass on and I shall just live as it is and let the Lord lead me.

The day finally is about to come. Two more days, and there it goes, classes where waking up early is a must, rushing to here and there, finding time to revise or even picking up the courage to do so. Holiday feels perenial and times where the mind began to wonder or rather, a simple question of someone you haven’t meet for few months would ask, “How was your holidays?” Just four little words that put you to a deep thought.

If you’d ask me, my holidays had been filled with many ups and downs. Well, of course my holidays would never go to waste with just movies, dramas, cartoons, games and sorts that revolves around the laptop whole day. I would admit there are days these happens, but what counter to those are my trips to south sydney: beginning from my place to Wollongong to Kiama and Kangaroo Valley. I begin to pick up more on mandarin with the help of my friend, Joe. Cooking also has been one of my hobbies with help from a cook book that belongs to Benedict, and a Penang chef Ming Hoey. Also, Joe had been there to assist me around in my cooking. Dishes, if you’re wondering, I manage to come up with food like nasi lemak, char kuey tiao, curry, loh shue fan, wan ton mee and such all from scratch. Well, feeling super proud that I now manage to cook these dishes, I hope to learn more. Food had been just plain for me for some long period of time till I learn how to use more spices or sauces to enhance the taste.

Somehow, there are things that affect me. Having to know the one I loved now belongs to someone, hurts to the bottom of my heart and how all along but now, she’d realise I shouldn’t be more but just a brother or a close friend. Can this really happen for me? I wake up everyday and till today, I was hoping it was all a dream but its as real as your everyday life. People ask about her, I just don’t know how to answer. However, I begin also to find more and more activities to occupy myself and keep my mind busy and off from wonderings that leads to dead ends. Sometimes when it starts, it ruminates upon things that somehow bound not to happen.

I do believe in miracles. Miracles, requires faith to believe. I pray God would help me gain my faith back in Him to see miracles once more.

Oh, did I not mention that I had a friend whom I know who speaks non-stop. I myself thought I was a good listener to people’s problems or people who which to borrow a ear. Not this time. I couldn’t take it from her, speaking out nonsense and her character just worsen the situation. I have lost all intention to even point out something in my head when she’s around. Besides being annoying, she can be a harmful person whom many are her victims, belearguered victims.

As I look back to the past, I remember seeing a vivacious me but not now. My change is that I am quite dependent, looking for aide to help keep my time passing and my mind from ruminating things I wouldn’t want. I which to love once more and be loved. I thank God daily I am able to go through each passing day with his love.

And now, here I go, studying for what will come in the next few days. *haha* I wish for better grades and a job in hand. I want a better life for I deserve more than just this. ROAR!!!.

Everywhere and everyone changes and so must I. Let’s hope you too. See yea.

kurietivu

Yes, I know it feels like I’m going to abandon this blog again. It is a problem maintaining one and more, I was hoping to constantly do an update weekly. Anyway, the things recently, a chat with my friend broke out about how to be outstanding, to proof yourself and to make yourself look different from others.

Somehow or rather, it boils down to the word “think”. Yes, think of what? anything. As long as your brain goes on thinking, it could be reasoning something, wondering something, analysing something, anything at all. It’s  a training that put your brain to work all the time which helps you think quicker, smarter and eventually you would stand out from others.

The example that my friend gave was a cup. If I were to put a cup in front of you, what do most people think of? Water? Thirsty? Well, what you think make you stand out. Another example was pointed out using another friend’s experience. He was questioned in the interview by the interviewer who was wearing a black shirt. He asked, “Why do you choose black?” So guess, what did he say? What is the first thing that comes through the great mind of yours? Is it because you like it? a favorite color? Or rather would you just stun looking back at the interviewer. My friend’s answer was, “Well, the colour black is easy to match with any other colour and it’s not easily stained.” Simple but would anyone possibly think of that to say?

Many things happen recently, but I couldn’t write on all. Hillsongs new album will be launching soon and I’m booking the ticket for the live album recording and hopefully it would be a great and awesome one. Friends, I was wondering who are they? Do they tell you stuff because they treat you as one? Do they remember you when they do something? How great are you an impact to that friend? Or must you be an impact to be remembered? I don’t know. As far as I know friends loses their touch slowly as soon as they parts. One way or another it does. Making new friends comes to play but finding a close friends is difficult. I could somehow say that its even harder than scoring an examination.

Selfishness, humans are, no matter how they deny it and its the same goes for me. Its totally impossible to be unselfish. People are selfish towards their future, losing touch with people that they don’t consider useful and only remembers them in that someday when both eyes meet. Selfish even towards oppurtunity that they consider themselves first rather than some others that may need it more than them and therefore hiding it from them. These thoughts dwell in me long enough but I still don’t have any solution to it.

Its hard. Some other challenges that struck me down was feeling helpless. Total uselessness feeling that slowly crawls up my body and empower me. I had a hard time feeling and thinking that there is no, at all, a solution to a problem I faced in life. Its so bothersome that it eats up one’s life slowly making them decay day by day. I have to thank my friends who supported me during this situation. Thank you.

Still other activities that filled my holidays till now is getting a freaking job during this recession. Gosh is it hard to even search for a suitable one. Some are either too far or time is problem, besides that, its competition. It stops me from having a nice holiday to other parts of Australia, having a flight home if its possible and maybe enjoying a better house than my current dodgy one.

Think, I shall cultivate this culture, train myself to read when there’s free time or analyse something to just keep my brain thinking for as often as I can. Hopefully, creativity comes along with this.

Well, thats all for now.

I know it’s kinda late to be writing about this tho the actual event had passed for 12 days. Lets just see, Aussies ushers the new year not just with Christmas and New Year’s Eve celebration but also Boxing Day. Well, not exactly that people go around boxing each other but I suppose it’s the time where people box up presents? But then again, Christmas is over. 

Anyway, back to what I was about to write. Boxing day is a great celebration in Australia. People are crazy over it. Here’s some pictures.

How nice if I were on the boats. I’ll definitely get a good view.

The crowd. This is just at one angles. I could take ten pictures with different crowds.

Sydney Oprah House and Harbour bridge. Magnificent isn’t it?

One of the few good pictures I manage to take. Those dark areas were covered by the trees.

Another view of the small firecrackers.

Amazing crowd also comes amazing toilet queue

the great queue at 4.45am!!! at David Jones shopping complex(opens at 6am)

A great crowd waiting to enter Myers(shopping complex) at 5am

Another view of MYER shopping complex

sales sales sales!!!

The crowd. Awesomely crazy!!!

People seems to be going higher looking for stuff. No one goes down

Sales, Discounts!!!

60% off, however I’ve seen 80% too.

Here’s a video of what happen at 5am at MYER shopping complex. Really crazy people. Wake up so freaking early to shop. I’m an exceptional case tho. I went to see the crowd which hmmm makes me the even more crazy one? haha=P

Another New Year celebration, the day before New Year is also one of Australia’s crazy event. I was a little tired from all the shopping and outings the past week before New Year’s Eve. Therefore, I planned to go out in the late evening and come home by 2am, an ideal time that people say you would reach home if you’re caught in the traffic which sounds pretty reasonable due to the fact that many are looking forward in ushering the new year. 

Therefore, I had a late lunch and rested well enough to gain enough energy for that night. I left at 4.30pm. One of my friend suggested that the place will be packed and we may not be able to enter the viewing areas. Viewing Areas, Sydney has 23 different spots of a great view of firecrackers. The spot that I went, can allocate 20 thousand people, no joke. Therefore, imagine if all 23 spots were full with each able to allocate 20 thousand people. A total of 460 thousand people. Anyway, when me and my friends reached at 4.30 pm we were able to get in after a super long queue a 100m queue? well, it was fast tho. There was a spot-check to check if we brought any harmful objects or alcoholic drink into those areas. It wasn’t that alcoholic is forbidden inside it but rather the container, glass that could be harmful. Also, it was a guard so that people don’t get drunk and cause a crazy havoc. 

 

How nice if I were on the boats. I'll definitely get a good view.

 

 

We were at a place called the Royal Botanical Gardens. The atmosphere was great. People were cheering around walking, having a picnic, and believe it a not the place when we enter was so packed that every inch of spot was filled with people. We couldn’t get a good spot to view the fireworks, Harbour bridge and Sydney Oprah house. Of course to get those three together in a picture would be fantastic but with the spot we finally found about an hour later wouldn’t permit there. There are big trees around that blocked the view. 

 

The crowd. This is just at one angles. I could take ten pictures with different crowds.

 

 

4 of us, me, Joe, Victor Lam, and Wesley, begin waiting for the first fireworks that would happen at 9pm. It was pathetically boring that we played dozens of rounds of Big 2(cho tai ti) hoping that time would fly quickly. Also, food and drinks there were a killer. A can of beer is $7 !!! where if you bought outside would cause one seventh of that or just $2 mayb? But it wasn’t a choice since we’re there and we just waited, long enough for our butt bone to ache and minds to wonder and voices to moan for something to do. We took walks around to find a good spot to take pictures of both the harbour bridge and Sydney Oprah house and we did get some photos. There were some special areas tho that we spotted and when asked, we were told that those places were free areas for those who queued about 9am in the morning. They were given special tags which allows them to enter freely to spots with great view and less crowd. Me and Victor Lam thought to ourselves, if we know we would come here at 9am get the tag and go back. Sigh, but we didn’t know about it.

 

Sydney Oprah House and Harbour bridge. Magnificent isn't it?

 

 

9pm, the moment that we’ve been waiting for, skies begin to darken and boom boom boom, there goes the firecrackers, awesome. It was really great, not like the ones I’ve seen in Malaysia, pathetic. However, comparing to the time we waited, I still think it was a waste of time. The others however, still waited so I waited along for the second fireworks at 12am, finale. Argh my those 3 hours were like 3 yrs. at the 2nd hour after the first fireworks, I and Victor Lam couldn’t take it anymore and we took a walk from one end to the other end. We reached back half an hour later and waited another half hour for the finale.

 

One of the few good pictures I manage to take. Those dark areas were covered by the trees.

 

 

12am, the moment all have been waiting for. All the crowds were cheering. Noise came all over the corner. Some asking others to sit which is common in a crowded area. Firecrackers came booming here and there. An awesome sight twice better than the one at 9pm. It went on and on for about 15 mins, and this is definitely the best fireworks I’ve ever seen. However, I couldn’t get good shots due to my lousy camera.

 

Another view of the small firecrackers.

Amazing crowd also comes amazing toilet queue

 

 

The moment it all ended, I signaled the rest and we jogged away from the crowd hoping to get the first few badge of buses back to our place. Joe, seeing us jogging pretty fast, sprint 200 meters forth leaving me and Victor in great shocked thinking what excitement has caught him. However, he slowed down and we caught up and manage to get into the buses we 5 to 10 mins of walk. We manage to reach home with great tiredness overwhelming us. It was an awesome experience tho.

And that’s how New Year’s Eve is celebrated. I’m glad that was over. My back did ache and my butt bone feels like I’ve been sitting on rocks. I did felt like an old man but it’s all better now.

Haha alright then, next up Kiama and the Falls trip South of Sydney.

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Christmas, shocking enough to tell, sometimes present is just all about Christmas, everybody in the world knows Santa’s some fairy tales invented to please kids. Moreover, people often call it ‘xmas’ in short.

What is Christmas? It is actually a celebration of the birth of Jesus, our Lord and Savior. Therefore if it is, why in the first place use ‘xmas’ instead of CHRISTmas? 

The spirit of giving is also the heard of Christmas but it turns out people give just because they expect the same from another. I do not mean everyone but it’s usually the case. It should be a nice heart to pour out blessing in other people’s life. 

This Christmas has been wonderful to me. In Australia, it’s a real experience to enjoy Christmas here. I wasn’t planning of buying any gifts this year because I couldn’t afford it but somehow I was a little obliged to give especially to certain people that I owe in life. I managed to squeeze in some budget and bought a few gifts for a few people. Christmas was even more blissful with the Christmas Spectacular in Hillsong Church. I had 11 tickets in hand. 5 of witch I gave to a friend of mind and another 5 for other friends and the other for me. I paid 9 of them however and 2 of which my friend paid. Unfortunately, on that very day, I lost them all 5 which was for my friends I couldn’t believe it at all. I check every single loop hole in my house but failed to find it.

I had no choice but to just proceed with the Christmas Spectacular, a performance with a story-line and music somewhat similar to High School Musical. We’re still allowed to go in but no doubt, priority was given to those with ticket. As we enter we got a sit not very far from the front but to the far end. It was near to the musicians tho. The show was awesome featuring the Grinch who hates Christmas due to his past that he was discriminated. The Grinch plotted to destroy Christmas in Whosville but rather the Christmas Spirit in Whosville was strong for they know that Christmas isn’t just about the presents but a heart of giving and the celebration of Jesus. He finally undo his actions and manage to celebrate Christmas together with the people in Whosville. 

I was beside this awesome guitarist. Gosh, his playing just amazes me with such great skills. Sorry to say I don’t have any photos. It was a really fun Christmas.

But there were plenty of dinners and food. mmm mmm I can remember it well. There was dinner the Ratilal’s house. They’re friends from my home church in Malaysia. The dinner was awesome. Then again, I had no pictures cause I didn’t bring my camera. And another dinner three days before Christmas at Mitchell’s place, a good friend of mine. Here’s some pictures.

 

The IKEA’s specialty meatballs… awesome

Rolene’s home made spaghetti

Chips !!! mmm

The group from left: Mitchell, Ming Hoey, Rolene, Benedict, Joe, Kenny

The turkey, tough meat

Mango Sago, courtesy from Ming Hoey

And there was another lunch and dinner with Auntie Catherine and their whole family in Kogarah. It was really an awesome day. Food were great the conversation were beautiful and best of all everyone enjoyed it. They bought me presents somehow. There were still some obliged to give back but haha, I didn’t have any. Oh well, I stayed till 12am where Andrew, Auntie Catherine’s son drove me home. Thanks for that. 

Alright, that’s all for Christmas. Up-coming would be Boxing Day celebration and New Year’s Eve in Sydney.

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The holiday’s have been going well. But there are times where boredom just soaks in. It’s crazy and I’ve learn my lesson to make time to apply jobs before the holiday starts. I must and definitely find work the next time. Oh, on one of the days two friends and I thought of some ideas for business. mmm mmm and there comes the excitement of money, profit, and the after-activities. It was funny thinking what we would do with the money when we didn’t even had a plan of how the business would run or will it even succeed. 

Anyway, the business was about Ipods and sub-rents. I can’t explain in detail, but it wasn’t a high profit margin gain but enough to actually keep us excited. The idea of job hunting still goes on, but failed. 

The holiday season is also a good time to think, experiment many types of food. We had steak, chicken chop rice, grilled salmon fish with red wine. Unfortunately, I don’t have the photos but if I can find them, I’ll definitely upload them. Its home-cooked and the taste is, hmmm comparable to high class restaurant? and I bet it’s healthier. 

Of course besides that, going to the city was also part of the holidays. Here are some interesting photos.

The two photos above were taken from Four Seasons hotel, one of Australia’s famous and most exquisite hotel. The reason we went there was actually to use their toilet but then on, we came across this marvelous ginger village. Awesome, isn’t it? 

One of the harbour in Sydney, hehe I don’t know the name but isn’t it nice. That place is full with bars and clubs alongside where beer is Aussie’s everyday drink.

Another picture nearby the harbour. Fascinating isn’t it?  =)

I found this in one of Australia’s newspaper. I never knew of other short forms used for msn. The news was actually mentioning that the short forms used in Australia in msn and part of the news is above. 

It’s so cool. I’ll update more for Christmas celebration soon. C yea

There are times when food just taste so good. Yes, when you’re hungry but what if when you’re not. Here are some pictures as I describe. Most of them are home cooked food to save money. Unfortunately, I didn’t manage to get some other really worth showing meals such as home cooked steak, steam chicken, South Indian curry vegetable, mmm aren’t you drooling right now? Haha. Here are some pictures.

Awesome. My first home made curry for lunch with roti canai. Woah I so miss Malaysia. Done by my housemate. Its so nice I ate every drop of it. My mouth couldn’t stop producing saliva.

A healthy breakfast. I woke up an hour and a half early about 7.30 am to wash up and prepare this for lunch break. Best of it, its super healthy. Ingredients: 4 slices of bread, few slices of lettuce, few slices of ham 2 hard boiled egg smashed up with mayonnaise. yum yum.

Oh my gosh, this is probably one of the tastiest I had so far in Sydney. This appears to be from a stall called “Mamak”, or shall I say a shoplot but it’s nothing like Malaysia’s mamak because it does looks more of a restaurant. The plain o roti canai(known as roti prata here) cost AUD$6. Thats equivalent to more than 15 roti canai in Malaysia. LoL. This dish, I think of it as pretty reasonable, a price of AUD$9.50? if I’m not mistaken? but it’s was nice, really nice. yum yum

A delicious birthday cake for Mitchell, the birthday boy. It’s spongy and full of fruits. mmm mmm.

In Sydney, yum cha is known as going for dim sum and so we had it. It was at a restaurant called Zilverfish, where many type of dim sum were chosen. Unfortunately, I don’t have photo’s of them. This picture was the desert. Sorry again for not knowing the name of it but it was a worth eating like this once a while. It’s a little expensive but satisfying and fulfilling. This is the porridge I had today,, made by my friend Mitchell. It has the spices and pepper smell that will really make you hungry even when you’re not and it’s mouth-savouring. 

This is the sausage and beer(not shown given for free in an engineering event. If you would like to know the beer was good, but not the sausage. It was said that the sausage was packed with unwanted meat. Ewww, awful but I ate it and only knew it weeks later when my tutor told me about it.

This is from one of the famous store in the suburb I’m staying. The restaurant name is Dong Dong noodles and this dish is called Pork Rice with Western Style sauce. As you observe, yes it is just plain o’tomato sauce. This stall however is famous for its noodle. It’s made specially by themselves in a large portion.

Now this is something familiar to you I hope. This is a picture taken in Malaysia at Shabu Shabu in Puchong. This is the octopus dish and I would say the top 5 dish at the restaurant. It’s sweet and slightly rubbery and it taste just mmm… unexpressible.

Well, that’s all for now. I’ll update sometimes sooner.

Interesting holidays. Here’s another spot to consider for a holiday if you’re in Sydney, Taronga Zoo, Sydney. This zoo however is still under some construction but there are more than enough to make you fall in awe.

However, there is a con to it which I shall say later on. Here are some pictures. There are massively an amount of 300 photos which I can’t upload here. So here are a few of them.

A boat at the harbour in Circular Quay

The ferry that will bring us to the zoo which lies across the sea not the boat which you previously see. =.=’

The group from left: Abbas Andy Rolene. I’m the photographer tho.

Harbour Bridge

Me and the ferry

Some island thought to be as a jail

Sydney Oprah House

Our destination from afar

Random photo

City from the port

In the cable car

Duck with tail. Head in the water

Ahhh… Australia’s kangaroo

A park in the zoo!!!

An odd and funny looking weight meter(those stuff where you put coins to measure your weight)

Lizard looking arrogant

Sheeps, actually my first time seeing it but they stink and there actually bigger than you may think

Ah your dinner? pork rib..!!!

Two koala’s sleeping back to back… what are you thinking!!!

Comodo Dragon

The crocodile which never closes its mouth

Lizard with really red lips watch closely..

All subang people, you know it an animal named ‘taipan’ lol

And another really odd name called ‘gila monster’

This agitated lizard actually got angry when my friend’s camera accidentally flashes it.

another photo of me and some animals… =.=’

Bad friend. Kicking people’s ass

Another fella. Choking poor ol’ lady

From this view, he smokes… haha nope he doesn’t smokes. It was a lolli

Ah the happy feets

The happy feet’s eater

Real happy feets!!!

Timon!!! timon and pumbaa… what a wonderful friend.

This bear is crazy. See the two ends of that wood he’s walking on. That’s his path, back and front, and never walks anywhere else. We’re beginning to thought if it’s a robot. lol

Red Panda if I’m not mistaken tho

Unfortunately, most of the animals were sleeping and hiding so that’s the bad part about the trip. Its really awesome tho but with those animals sleeping really spoil the fun. There is one other thing that I didn’t included in the pictures is the seal show which I find it amazing how seals were train to perform and of course some awareness that we shouldn’t throw rubbish into the sea.

Yup, so that’s all for now. I’ll update more on my holidays.